Editors Foreword

Welcome Sports fans, to the first edition of MEAT! Magazine. For those of you who haven't heard of us, we are a publication dedicated to bringing you the latest Blood Bowl news, gossip, and the inside information on the Blood & Snot league.

We'd like to thank the owner of MEAT! Magazine, the exalted Count Ruprecht von Murdoch; who kindly chained us to our desks in almost complete darkness to work on this publication. All hail our lord and master!

Read on Sports fans.....and be amazed!

The Regular Season Kicks Off

The League Commissioner has stated that he is very happy with the state of the League overall. As a newly formed league the Team retention has been high and the number of expansion Teams has surprised even the Commisioner.

During an Interview he was quoted s saying:

“I know we cut it short... but the new season will be great,” and

“We went through the mill, but hey that’s blood bowl  ... We’ve lost some great coaches, recruited better ones ... and some of the coaches who decided we weren’t for them have moved on... good luck to them”

The rumour mill has it that there has been an increasing spread of Nurglerot amongst those Coaches’ and Teams that are no longer under the Blood & Snot umbrella. Coincidence or malice? You decide.

There are plenty of new Rivalries already taking shape and old ones that are opening old wounds.

This Season is looking to be a fantastic orgy of violence, intrigue and of course Blood Bowl.

Scry Sports

For those of you who don’t know, Count Ruprecht von Murdoch is broadcasting Blood & Snot games LIVE via Scry Sports.


How it works: Simply take the Scry Sports crystal ball and point the anntenEYE at the pitch. This image is captured and then sent up to the Skaven-run Scatter-Light, which, like the name suggests, scatters the image all over the realm. You can capture this light in your very own Scry Sports crystal ball at home, for your viewing pleasure! You can get so close to the action, you can almost smell the Orcs!

While you’re enjoying all the wholesome treats that only a game of Blood bowl can offer, spare a thought for those poor rats working up there so high above us - they only went up there because they thought the moon was made of cheese!

Grudges Arise

The newly formed Division5 Blood and Sweat kicked off and caused quite a stir. It appears that the Long Jetty Prawners crowd became an influencing factor as just prior to kick off a large unidentified flying object caused the death of Rookie Saurus Mohrngred. The Saurus didn’t see the genetically modified prawn until it was too late! But at least the Autopsy revealed that the Saurus didn’t feel too much and certainly didn’t suffer.

This has caused the Unimaginable Scales Coach Ruiner to become enraged. Even during our scrounging for Potions and bribes we could hear him scream Keeeeel them! Keeeeel them aaaaaaawwwllllll!"

It’s a disgrace that our hard earned Entry Fee and concessions go to paying these Estrogen laden meatheads! But at least they give us something to watch on Scry Sports primetime every day every hour!

 

Coach Review

 

HirnKhan (aka “Coward Coach” after the catacombs incident) – Division3 Coach
Division 5 Administrator
Team – Rats with Attitude
Current Record – 0-0-1

After his contract was abruptly brought to a close with the Bloody Horns of Khorne he has now signed a Coaching contract with the Rats with Attitude. No one is quite sure where they came from, but judging by the barrels of Orca Cola Mix, we assume that they have been drugged by the Coward Coach. We will be looking into this further and provide details to you our public as they arise – or we place the evidence and report it to you.

Snotty Goblins at it Again

 

Today we feature a notorious player of the Snot Gobblers. Cheekalob, their Chainsaw wielding Mazmurderoir

M!M: Hello Cheekalob, how have you been settling into he Season so far?

C: "So peepul wunt to see me dead huh ... or even wurserer !"

M!M: No need to shout no Cheekalob-

C: I Af told dem ova n ova dat dis iz just a tooof picka !! mi teefs are always avin stuff stuck between dem

M!M: Goodness Cheekalob, no need to get so close, I’m a Journalist and completely neutral. Erm… watch where your pointing the Chainsaw please.

C: Naa listen tell all dem other playurs dat if they want to try killz me up , dey can ! But first off dey have to get past de trollz ! And then I have me sekret wepun !

MEAT! Magazine apologizes for the short interview; it was at this Point that Scabor’s Journalist passed out. We haven’t heard much from him since. Please return him if found.

 

 

Bounty Bars

It seems some players have been attracting a lot of attention recently..... so much so, they've got a price on their head! Needless to say, these players ought to be careful on the field..... or some of their own team mates might collect on the bounty!

Technicians, Astechs, Repairs and Reward Points

This message will address the Various issues regarding Repairs and how to reduce costs so that you can maintain a good cash flow.

This cash flow will help you later, when you Graduate LoV and start making your way through the more expensive Lv2 Raid Operations and eventually the Conquer Operations. The fundamentals that you will be learning throughout your time in the Legion will help you grasp the Principles of the Metagame.

Note: In order to drive the lesson home check the Bulk Repair cost before you repair your mechs. Do this when you have a Good Stock of techs available. When they are Green youll probably be spending around 60-75% of the bulk cost. But it will reduce soon enough.

Let us begin by exploring Technicians. Much has been said about the Ease of Bulk Repairs. The are easy to complete, Granted. But once your have a good stock of Technicians then you can save up to 60% (sometimes more but not much more) of the Bulk Price.

Note: During your repairs, the Techs will be promoted. be sure that you dont assign work to techs that you no longer have.


You can only buy Green Technicians. This is ok. Be prepared to spend a little more than average on your Repairs. It is recommended to buy your Green Techs in Bulks of 5. The reason is simple. You will then be able to repair up to 5 slots/mechs simultaneously. I prefer to only repair 1 unit at a time, but there is no reason why you cant do more.

Your Green techs arent very good at repairing. To repair armour their Base Roll is 8. I would reduce this down to 6 or 7 depending on the cash that is in the Purse. This will allow the Green Techs to increase experience through succesfull rolls. They will then quickly achieve Regular Status. This is much more prefereable. When repairing Critical slots, check whether you have Regular Techs unqueued (not repairing). Use these as a minimum standard. Green Techs are simply too expensive.

Note: If you have 1-3 slots of armour (internal or external) to repair then just use the Base Rolls with a Green Tech, the repair even when the roll fails will only take a few Cbills and seconds. Then the Section will be repaired.


The Regular are really the better stock you want to be using untill you have a very stable cash flow. To repair armour the roll is a 6 and only slightly higher for Internal Structure. I do not recomend changing the Roll value. 6 is cheap for armour. This will quickly save your hard earned Battle Payout. Regarding Critical Slots, it is recommended to use the Regular Techs for Actuators, Shoulders and Hips. Again the Base Roll they enjoy is much less compared to a Green Tech.

Note: the Regular is a very desired level of Technician, they can repair most Structure and Armour at very cheap cost.


Once the Regular is promoted to Veteran things become tempting. The Base roll to repair armour is 5. Once you have a good stock of Vets it is recommended to use them for all Armour repairs exceding a damage level of 5. So a Large Laser hit is best repaired by a Vet. For Internal Structure the Vet will give you the best performance also. For Medium Mechs and above, use only Vets to repair armour. Even a few failed rolls is still cheaper over the course of the whole repair, so just be patient. For Weapon and Auxialary systems (Such as Heatsinks and Beagle Probes) use only the Veterans. Again they present the best value for money.

Note: Veteran Techs can and will Retire at a moments notice. It is much harder to become an Elite Tech due to the overall chance of Retirement untill they reach this stage.


Elite Techs, once you get them look very good. The repair Base Roll is low. However they are very expensive. The best place to Queue them is for Gyro and Engine Repairs. The Elite Tech will make short work of damaged Cores. Apart from that I wouldnt recommend using them. Everything they can do is offset by the Cost difference between Elite and Veteran and Elite and Regular. The Veteran gives you a very high chance of success at a much reduced cost.

There is also another type of Technician. The Astech. These Pilots repair only their own Damage, however it is greatly reduced in price and a very good chance of success. If you have an Astech, use ONLY the pilot to repair the mech. Anything else is a waste of money.

So that rounds out the Technicians. As a reminder, ensure that you have 5 Green techs at all times. This ought to give you the best chance (relevant to Cbills) of building a good stock of Technicians.

When money is short or worse yet, Technicians are short and you have a Prized unit that needs repairing then Use RP to repair the mech.

1. Campaign
2. Other
3. Use Reward Points
4. Repair Mech
5. select Damaged Mech.

Unit repaired. Easy as that. I recommend only using this when you have:

A. Too few tech,
B. Too few Cbills
C. Noone else has Cbills for the repair
D. You have too few mechs in your hangar

That is the Topic Repairs Covered in full. More isnt required to know. Once you start doing this and you have a good Maintained stock of Techs you will save 10'000s of Cbills over the course of the cycle.

Spend Wisely, Delegate Correctly, Execute to the Best Plan.